Things only a Mother can Teach - Clean (21-01-2010)

Daily Joke Visit The-Jokes.com Please, do not reply to this e-mail. Go to the end for contact info and removal instructions. If you're under 18, get your parents' permission before you read this. The Holiday Classics! Last years top selling holiday items are back! When you think of holiday smells, do you think of Christmas trees and freshly baked cookies? What about farts? Well you will this year with our Farting Santa! Don't worry, it's a replica of the sound only! Feeling a bit more risque this holiday season? There's the Mooning Santa and Perv the Elf! You won't believe what comes out of this pipsqueaks mouth! Get your shopping done early! Things only a Mother can Teach 1. My Mother taught me about ANTICIPATION... "Just wait until your father gets home." 2. My Mother taught me about RECEIVING.... "You are going to get it when we get home!" 3. My Mother taught me to MEET A CHALLENGE... "What were you thinking? Answer me when I talk to you ... Don't talk back to me!" 4. My Mother taught me LOGIC... "If you fall out of that swing and break your neck, your not going to the store with me." 5. My Mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE... "If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way." 6. My Mother taught me to THINK AHEAD... "If you don't pass your spelling test, you'll never get a good job." 7. My Mother taught me ESP... "Put your sweater on; don't you think I know when you're cold?" 8. My Mother taught me HUMOR... "When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don't come running to me." 9. My Mother tau! ght me how to BECOME AN ADULT... "If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up." 10. My Mother taught me about SEX.... "How do you think you got here?" 11. My Mother taught me about GENETICS... "You're just like your father." 12. My Mother taught me about my ROOTS... "Do you think you were born in a barn?" 13. My Mother taught me about WISDOM OF AGE... "When you get to be my age, you will understand." 14. And my all time favorite... JUSTICE... "One day you'll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you... then you'll see what it's like" BABE AND HUNK OF THE DAY Daily Babe: Click Here Daily Hunk: Click Here Please help pass on the laughs - forward this email to your friends and co-workers. TO SUBSCRIBE TO THIS BULLETIN: Click Here TO CANCEL YOUR SUBSCRIPTION TO THIS BULLETIN: Click Here For comments or suggestions, please use our Contact Form The-Jokes.com © 2001-2009. All rights reserved.